So it appears as if I'm on the other side of the hill that is ms flare...in other words, the immune system has calmed (g'nite, Alice!) and the only reminder of those 2 lower case letters is the slight left foot drag while walking. Well, that and the hourly or semi-hourly trip to the ladies room:-)
Last week was more than stressful. The kind of stress that you can't see the other side of and can't possibly think how you're getting out of it. I consciously sat down and counted my blessings one by one. I'm healthy (with the exception of holes in my central nervous system, but who's counting?), have a fantastic husband, amazing parents and family members, incredible children, and loving friends. My work is rewarding. Our church family is uplifting. I have a beautiful view of the yellow, orange, red, and brown leaves over there in the woods from the picture window of the comfortable house that we call home. My kids are receiving arguably the best education offered in this area. My husband, who drives a tractor trailer, has not had anyone drive underneath of him lately. We have enough coffee to get through the week. And my car started, though slooowly, after the kids left the doors open for hours.
That's a lotta good stuff right there! But when things get scary in one facet of life, be that health, finances, relationships, etc., it's easy to get tunnel vision and forget about my abundance of blessings. Makes me think a lot of myself and whatever stressor is wanting my attention for the moment. God, in His faithfulness, always sends the "snap out of it" message...
This Saturday night, my 10yr old son scored his first goal in hockey. This is the child who, by all intents and purposes, should still have the GI disease he was born with. We were told that, if he survived, he'd have a measurable level of mental retardation. As if that wasn't enough, he was vaccine injured at 18mos and dx'd aspergers. They kept changing the labels from aspergers to autism and back again, depending upon which dr I ran him to. I didn't care much about the label, just cared that he be "fixed". After many years of literal hell, family battles, a tanked marriage, and completely drained finances, I finally went to my knees and handed it over. Yeah, it's where I should've started the journey, but I'm quite stubborn. As pretty much anyone who knows me knows (apologizing for the repeat!)...we were led to the Family Hope Center and given a program that restored him. I was told just 4 years ago by a licensed psychologist all the things he wouldn't be. I don't blame the fella, he really felt I wasn't accepting the hand that was dealt. He was right, I wasn't accepting of it.
So when my son ran into the kitchen 3 mos after beginning that program and said, complete with jazz hands, "Mommy! It's like somebody lifted the clouds!", I cried. When he started to read with ease and earned solid A's and B's on his school work, I cried. When his ped said she considered him free of autism, I cried. When I'd see all the kids wanted to sit with him at lunch and play with him at recess, I cried. When he stepped on the hockey dek for the first time, I cried. And when he took a shot on net and that ball rolled across the goal line...I nearly had a mini stroke! I put my hands over my eyes and it was like all of those "bad" years flashed before me! They were tough, but God brought us out of it. He always does.
I'll screw up again and allow something to stress me out, momentarily placing all of those incredible blessings on the back burner. Alice will wreak havoc. I'll feel like a hot mess. I'll probably even blog about it...but it will pass, because it always does. It's just the kind of God we have.
May you be blessed!