Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Sometimes I Don't Feel Very...Useful?

This is the face of the girl who was picked first for playground games.  First.

And it wasn't because of my Trak shoes or Garanimal outfits, though I'm certain my keen fashion sense only added to my popularity.  If there was such a thing as a "Garanimals casting call" back in the 70's, I'd have won...hands down.  I still dress this way today.  I match my socks to my top.  But I digress...

All through school?  Active.  Athletic.  Hard working.  In college?  Same as in school with the exception of the last quality.  The 5 years in between graduating college and becoming symptomatic?  Wow.  I worked so hard that just thinking about it tires me out.  Even up until this school year, I worked 50+ hour weeks.  I never said I worked them with ease...but I worked them.  On many occasions, I felt like this:

But we just had a teachers' In Service day, and while that may ordinarily mean sitting down to perform cerebral tasks like lesson planning and such, it meant the complete opposite for us on this day.  We were to clean our classrooms and perform maintenance tasks around the building.  It's a great time of fellowship and feeling like a team.  Unless you're me, being passed on the left by your expecting coworker who had twice as much trash in both of her hands than I could muster.  Thankfully, there are no Team Captains for In Service days.  I'd be lucky to be picked last, if at all. 

See, when I do physically strenuous tasks, it's not long before I'm slightly foggy in the noggin.  It's as if my muscles pull energy reserves from my brain.  My left eye checks out.  My legs become weak.  And I feel less useful than this:

...because at least Car Pool Kenny can get you to work on time if you live in a state that has those HOV lanes.  We don't, so that doesn't make me feel quite so bad.

But it's not as if no one gets me at work.  For instance, my boss stopped by to vacuum my classroom for me, because she knows that attempts at completeing a "push/pull" sort of exercise is my kiss of death.  As I sat on top of my desk, swinging my tingling feet, I tried to make myself feel better.  I told myself, "she's a couple years younger, that's why she's so energetic" and "it's really okay and totally not embarrassing to be sitting here on the desk while she's working" and "vacuuming's just not my thing".  After all, I sponged my chalkboard off all by myself, didn't I?  That brought back fond memories of the detentions I served in the 9th grade for excessive talking, laughing, and throwing my pencils into the spongie drop ceiling tiles.  Digressing again... 

That was my big contribution du jour.  Straightening up my room, sponging off my chalkboard, and taking 2 handfuls of trash to the dumpster.  Sadly, that was all I was capable of.  I then had to go home to rest a bit before going back to take another shot at being useful.  By the time my friend, Vertigo, left...and my strength came back...the work was pretty much done.

So for the next In Service day, I think I'm going to get me one of these...

I'll call her "Take Along Tina"...and I'll prop her in my classroom with the vacuum handle in her hand.  She can't do any less than I'd ordinarily do, right?  Meanwhile, I'll be at my desk, performing cerebral-like tasks.  Because the mind is a dangerous thing...and I've still got mine;-) 

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