Thursday, February 13, 2014
Happy "Sweet 16th", Beautiful Daughter
Happy Sweet 16th to the most...
I'm having trouble with the huge listing of adjectives, because I start typing and they sound like I'm quoting the fruits of the Spirit. I guess I actually am.
What can I say about my Bean?
Christ-like. Every adjective I type falls under that. Loving, caring, kind, compassionate, resilient, selfless, incredibly hard working, just...amazing. And beautiful. And smart. And...amazing.
It's not easy being a kid in this house. These kids have experienced some rather unflattering, possibly worrying, borderline frightening moments where their mother was (okay, 'is') concerned. The awkward word salads, Olympic-sized falls, days of post-shot side effects, and pseudobulbar roller coaster rides. Those are just the highlights.
It's not easy being my daughter. She's grown up in the shadow of a mother with holes in her head, and a brother who's had a rough handful - maybe 2 handfuls - of years with his health. There were times she's felt overlooked. Ugh, just typing that brings tears to my eyes. If she only knew how often she was at the forefront of my thoughts. All the lengthy drives to my appointments and studies...and to her brother's appointments...I wanted nothing more than to be home with her, sitting with her, reading to her, playing games with her. And all the times I'd choose to go to the rehabilitation hospital's chapel to read and pray (instead of clip coupons and gossip with the other moms) while my son was receiving treatments...and the times I took their picture with me so I would have the courage to inject myself with medicine that was making me horribly ill - she was foremost in my thoughts. My oldest 'baby'. My beautiful little girl. Sure, I had told her how much I loved her and wanted to do things with her, you know, as I was dozing off or on my way out the door to yet another appointment, but I always wished she could truly know my heart. I would whine to the Lord and explain that it...all this health stuff...wasn't fair for these kids. None of it. Not fair.
...has made Himself so visible and real to her, occasionally through those hard moments - maybe 'especially' through those hard moments - which I had determined to be "not fair". She has a scripture for every occasion. When the going gets rough, and it certainly has done that, she seeks refuge in the Word. She is an example.
That's what I could say. She is an example...of Christ-like living.
She's also a quiet leader who envisions herself in a ministry position. She prepares Bible studies and devotionals with a peaceful smile that she probably doesn't even realize she's wearing as she works. I suppose it speaks to that verse in Philippians about the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, guarding hearts and minds in Christ.
That peaceful smile :) God has done - and will continue to do - incredible things through her.
And she's my Bean. I can't measure my love for her, because no one's ever come up with those sorts of words. Not even me - in my most intricate of word salads.
Happy Birthday, Bean. You are loved beyond words...even made up ones ;)