Sunday, December 19, 2010

Is This Stuff Contagious?

I'm thinking it may be.  Or at least the symptoms.  Do you think one can just catch the symptoms?  Allow me to explain.

Early last week, my husband left for work...late.  He had been up 2 hours earlier, but just couldn't seem to get out of the house (eeek!) and he does NOT have the excuse of "I had to style my hair", because he's pretty bald and what's not scalp is cut with a #1 attachment.  He was just late and couldn't explain it.  My husband?  Is never late.  Ever.  I?  Am always late.  Always.  I really don't mean to be.  Really.

But it's not just that.  About 10 minutes later, I heard the roar of his truck coming up the driveway.  He rushed into the house, explaining...with a look of utter shock on his face...that he forgot his cell phones.  You don't understand.  My husband would leave his glasses behind, rendering him legally blind, before he would leave his phones!  He looked at me in a very boyish manner and said, "I really don't know how that happened..."  Mmm hmm.

On Friday morning, I made my way downstairs to prepare my pot of coffee and...what was that on the counter?  My husband's thermos?  Full of coffee?  Okay, hold up.  His phones and glasses would be left behind before that thermos!  A little while later, I heard the text message alert on my phone.  It was my husband.  "U can hav my coffee.  Dont say a word."  Mmm hmm.

This morning, he was a busy little worker bee in the kitchen.  Next to the stove, he had a carton of eggs out...loaf of bread...some frozen hash brown patties...frozen sausage links...and full pot of coffee.  Each Sunday morning, he morphs into Emeril and whips up huge family breakfasts, then proceeds to hound the kids and I until we're ready and in the truck for church.  Remember, he lives in the "House of Late".  If he doesn't hound, we aren't getting anywhere on time!  So as I'm pouring my coffee and having simple conversation with him, he grabs ahold of the electric burner coil of the stove and yells out, "OW!  STUPID $%@..."   

He said he wanted to "level" the burner coil, because it looked a little crooked.  But forgot he turned it on.  Um?

I've done a lot of things, but not that.  I've forgotten to put deodorant on, and forgot to rinse the shampoo from my hair before I shut off the shower water.  Oh, and I've grabbed ahold of a hot cookie tray without a mit (and didn't feel the pain, because my hand was hot/cold dead).  But walking out without my coffee?  Never.

I guess it could be a "sympathy flare".  Or pseudo flare.  Whichever.  When I was terribly ill during my pregnancy with our daughter, he was also ill.  When I went through nearly 2 years of monthly migraines, he had low grade headaches.  But this is too much.  Yesterday, I slipped down the stairs (again) and he was there to see it.  I could see that he was upset by it.  I'm sure this stuff scares him at times.  I'm sure he goes through moments of playing his own version of the What If Game.  But geez...he doesn't have to go and grab a burner coil over it.  One of us has to exhibit a certain level of safety around here!

And there he is..."HONEY!  It's 9:04!  You still have to get a shower.  We're going to be LATE!"  Mmm hmm...

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